One Line Philosopher TOP TEN!!

February 5, 2018

 

10.   I told my doctor I swallowed a wrench. He said, “This tool—shall pass!

 

9.   Never point a finger when you can lend a hand  

 

8.   I have an alter ego but only every other day.    

 

7.   My wife offered me a broom when she saw a foot of snow on my car. I told her, “Okay, but you’ll have to teach me how to fly it. " 

 

6.   Be an oasis not a mirage. 

 

5.   Sometimes you have to put your foot down to get a leg up

 

4.   I grew up on a crocodile ranch. I was an only child—eventually 

 

3.   My dog got into my stash of Viagra— at least he stopped chasing his own tail.  

 

2.   There’s a lot of testosterone in my marriage—too bad none of its mine.  

 

1.   I’m not smart enough to dumb things down.

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