10. Funeral home: Null and Void
9. People aren’t dragged to success as much as the tide recognizes their effort
8. Try withholding your attack until you understand your enemy.
7. The difference between mediocrity and greatness is consistency
6. When my girlfriend scratches my back she’s collecting DNA to make a nicer me
5. While it’s important to win it’s imperative to learn why
4. They found a fossil of a seven-foot lobster—right next to a huge bowl with traces of melted butter
3. You can’t explore your future in a safe house
2. Make defining your life your manifest
1. If Obama is the closest thing to being a Jew then I’m LeBron James
Dave Weinbaum's 2018 One Line Philosopher's Desk Calendar coming soon!!!!